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Family Tribute by
Doug Boilesen, March 25, 2013 at Celebration of Life
Service
Good-morning.
On behalf of our family, I want to
thank you for coming today.
Dad was quite specific that when this
day came and we were gathered in this special place
that the theme should be “Joy and Thanksgiving”. In
some notes that Dad wrote in 2004 he identified sources
during his life for his own joy and thankfulness. He
began in these notes where you can guess he would start,
with his wife Betty. He wrote the following to us, his
children:
“What a blessing she was to my life
and her entire family and I know she would say what
a blessing each of her family members were to her.
I like to recall from each of your births how precious
you were in her tender care. How can we help but feel
“joy and thanksgiving” for the remainder of life’s
journey?”
We were all fortunate to have had
9 more years with him after he made those observations
about the remainder of his journey. But instead of the
remainder, let’s start at the beginning, when on April
18, 1923 Axel was born to Chris and Elizabeth Boilesen.
Named after his grandfather Axel, which in Danish means
the Father of Peace, he was the fifth of six children
and was the baby of the family for 12 years until the
sixth child, Garold was born. The family lived on a
farm outside Cotesfield, NE.
In Dad’s words “it was a simple farm
environment with an abundance of quiet times. Life
on a farm consisted of hard work with no questions
asked. But there was always parental love.”
The Great Depression, drought, and
loss of their farm made the 1930’s difficult years but
through it all Dad said he never heard bitterness or
complaints by either of his parents. Instead he learned
the importance of family and to be thankful for what
they did have. He also probably learned a thing or two
about politics since FDR was revered by his Dad and
fireside chats were part of their home.
Dad joined the army in 1943 and was
in Europe until the end of the war but he never talked
about his war experiences until 1996 when he finally
wrote down some details. One description that stands
out in his writings was when his company commander was
reading off the names of those being reassigned as replacements
following initial heavy losses at the Battle of the
Bulge. One particular soldier seated next to Dad broke
down crying when he heard his name called since everyone
knew what those reassignments potentially meant. Dad
asked if he could volunteer to take his place…and that
was immediately done. Dad’s explanation for volunteering
was that the other soldier seemed much younger and it
just seemed like he should go instead. The letters Dad
received from family and particularly from my mother
were treasured by him during these months when joy would
be hard to imagine; and as for thankfulness Dad summarized
his war experiences by simply stating “I was always
thankful for survival.”
After the war and his discharge from
the Army he married Betty Ann Barr on August 25, 1946.
Let me quote again directly from his notes:
Great joy and thanksgiving – There
is no limit to the importance of this long and blessed
period. Love letters, beautiful bride, loving and
caring mother of our three children, supporter of
my satisfying career and her glorious influence on
everyone she met. I cannot express how thankful I
have felt for these blessings. Our family at each
stage of life brought special joy to our lives.”
In the final section of his Joy and
Thanksgiving notes which he titled “Church Family” he
wrote the following:
“Essentially the entire period of
our marriage, birth of our children and grandchildren
centered on this church and the many dear friends
associated with St. Paul United Methodist Church.
The spiritual strength and support by this extended
family was always with me. My religious beliefs lead
me to be supportive of all faiths that recognize a
“Greater Power” with love for all.”
If we had time there are so many other
specific memories of joy and thanksgiving that we could
talk about: 71 Club, Men’s Club, his love of playing
games like pitch, bridge, sequence, croquet and golf;
making home-made ice cream; collecting antique phonographs
and radios; his annual June 5 Danish Holiday letter
to his children and grandchildren; our family’s annual
Easter Egg Competition; the annual Axel and Betty Christmas
card: Ole and Lena jokes, life at 544 Lyncrest and his
9 years at The Legacy Estates – all of these trigger
memories that we will have for the rest of our lives.
And all of these connect to family and friends of Axel
and directly reflect the character of Axel.
Abraham Lincoln said the following
about character.
Character is like a tree and reputation
like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it;
the tree is the real thing.
Many friends in the last few days have
described Dad’s character just as you would expect with
words like, “he was devoted to his family and a great
friend”; he “brought joy to everyone he touched”, he
was friendly to all who met him, he was authentic, he
was the most genuine human being I have ever known,
he had an infectious good humor.”
Axel Christian Boilesen was clearly
the tree and the real thing. Our family knows how lucky
they were to have him in their lives. And all of us
truly believe he will always be with us.
Postscript
Axel had a great sense of humor but
he was particularly amused by Ole and Lena.
Here are five jokes that I know he
would have loved but they didn't make it into our Family
Tribute comments at his Celebration of Life Service.
Ole went to the doctor for a physical.
After Ole was dressed the doctor came in and said
"I am sorry Ole, but you are very sick and have only
a few weeks to live". Ole went home with a heavy heart
to tell Lena the news. After Ole told Lena he sat
in his easy chair and Lena went to the kitchen. Soon
a heavenly aroma came from the kitchen. Lena was making
his favorite cookies! "Lena must really love me" he
thought. Ole went into the kitchen and started to
take a cookie. Lena slapped his hand away and said
"Get avay! Dese cookies aren't for you, der for da
funeral!"
Lena passed away and Ole called 911.
The 911 operator told Ole that she would send someone
out right away. "Where do you live?" asked the operator.
Ole replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive." "Can
you spell that for me?" the operator asked. There
was a long pause and finally Ole said, "How 'bout
if I drag her over to Oak Street and you pick her
up der?"
Ole had his will made out in a very
simple way. Being of sound mind I spent all my money...
One day Ole went to work with one
black shoe and one brown shoe on. His co-worker Swen
called his attention ot it. Oh yah, said Ole. I got
another pair just like it at home.
Ole, Sven and Lars die in a tragic
Lutefisk accident. They are met by God on the stairway
to heaven. God says, "There are 3,000 steps to heaven.
It's very serious up there. I'll tell you a joke on
each 1,000th step you reach. If you laugh you go to
hell." So they start walking and reach to the first
1,000th step. God tells a joke, Lars laughs out loud
and goes straight to hell. Ole and Sven look at each
other nervously. On the 2,000th step God tells another
joke, Sven tries his best but laughs and goes to straight
to hell. On the 3,000th step God tells the last and
best joke, Ole doesn't laugh and proceeds to the gate.
Suddenly, Ole bursts out laughing hysterically. God
asks, "What are you laughing about?". Ole replies,
"Oh dat's funny. I yust got da first yoke!"
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