By Doug Boilesen, December 2015
Axel and Betty (aka Dad and Mom) loved
the Christmastime season. They were Methodists and Christmas Eve at
church was always central to their schedule.
What I'm documenting here, however,
are the other family holiday activities that were repeated annually
at Christmastime which I am calling Axel and Betty Christmas Traditions.
These traditions clearly have some limits
as to reader interest. Nevertheless, I hope from a cultural perspective
that some value is found by non-family members learning what one family
did at Christmastime for over sixty years.
The following examples of Christmas
cards, cookies and food, tree decorating, Christmas punch, music and
other holiday season activities are what I remember about my family
as a member of Axel and Betty's family in Lincoln, Nebraska from 1946
to 2013.
Traditions
Some of Axel and Betty's Christmastime
activities are surely rooted in their parents' practices, Chris and
Elizabeth Boilesen and Manley and Anna Barr.
Whatever their source, if some of these
are continued by their descendents perhaps documenting these details
will add a little understanding and enjoyment to their own process
of making memories and traditions. Perhaps these recollections will
also trigger others to remember their own histories and family traditions.
Christmas Cards
The most tangible reminder of our parent's
Christmastime traditions is their Christmas cards.
1959
My parents loved receiving cards and
Mom found different ways to display those cards.
Dinner at Lyncrest December 1955 in
living room with Christmas cards on display (Grandma Barr, Mom,
Bev in arms, Doug, Gary, Edna and Ray)
They also loved sending their annual
Boilesen family card to friends and relatives.
For decades it was a photograph that
was the centerpiece of their Christmas card.
This practice of incorporating a family
photograph into the Christmas greeting card began in 1946, the first
year Axel and Betty were married, and continued until Betty passed
in 2000 and Axel in 2013.
1955
Axel and Betty's photocard was a photograph
inserted into a Season's Greetings card made for a photograph (see
above) or more commonly a photograph printed on a card with a selected
printed message for that card.
The Christmas photocard was Axel and
Betty's standard Christmas messaging until 1976 when they then started
creating an 8 1/2 x 11 Christmas card with multiple pictures and text.
This new card was made by arranging and photocopying multiple pictures
onto one card and then folding and sending it in a legal size envelope.
Over the years only a few of the photographs
used for the Christmas card were done "professionally."
Most were taken by Dad, or a friend or by using a tripod and timer
on the camera that would give you 10 seconds to get into position
before it flashed so that all of us could be in the picture. These
were the days of film and flashbulbs so you couldn't see right away
if the picture just taken was going to be 'the one" to be used
for the Christmas card.
A family portrait taken on December
1, 1965 at the Photograph Studio of Miller & Paine, Inc., Lincoln
NE for the 1965 Christmas card
Choosing a photograph, then selecting
card stock with a pre-printed greeting, giving the order to Walgreens
or a photo store to make 100 or so cards, working their way through
their address book (which for 65 years was their manual process as
they never used any electronic address book), then starting the process
of signing and writing messages, addressing each envelope and finally
stamping and mailing those cards -- this was their annual ritual that
never missed a year.
I can remember the writing and addressing
of the envelopes as an event in itself. Mom preferred Dad to address
the cards because she said his hand-writing was better. That was true,
if by hand-writing she meant his printing of letters was better than
her cursive. Dad was a Civil Engineer who had hand-drafted design
specifications and drawings for decades so he probably did most of
the addressing work because his printed letters were clear.
The card, from our home to yours, showed
in a variety of ways that we were doing well and that our family was
growing and changing. Printed messages on the cards over the years
said that we wished you "Season's Greetings, a Joyous Christmas,
Best Holiday Wishes, A Blessed Christmas, Happy Holidays, Peace on
Earth, Christmas Greetings, Merry Christmas, Holiday Joy, and a Happy
New Year." Cards could also include personalized messages on
the back of the card, usually written by Mom even if her cursive was
not that legible.
Cards after 1976 usually had more detailed
preprinted text to go with the photographs or quotes like this one
from Emerson on their 1976 card that expresses the uniqueness of moments
and our wish to you for a "Christmas filled with beautiful moments".
Giving a card to everyone on their Christmas
list was clearly important, especially sending cards to those who
didn't live in Lincoln. And having a picture of the family on the
card naturally was a great way to update everyone on what the family
now looked like.
Axel and Betty's Christmas cards and
their annual process of sharing a picture of their family via the
US Postal Service was certainly not unique. For decades, countless
cards have been sent by millions of other families with simliar holiday
"Season's Greetings." Of course, using the mail service
to communicate and the penny-postcards of a previous generation had
been part of everyday life for sometime. I can remember hearing stories
about my Grandma Barr and her sister Tay, who actually lived on farms
only a few sections apart, sending multiple postcards to each other
each week before they had telephones. I saw one of their penny postcards
years ago that said simply "I did the wash today. How about going
fishing on Wednesday?"
That changed in the 21st century and
sending Christmas cards in the mail became a tradition in decline.
Facebook, e-mail and other electronic "greetings" resulted
in fewer and fewer people sending cards through the mail.
So technology has had an impact on sending
Christmas cards.
But in 1946 sending Christmas cards
was a common practice. Axel and Betty's Christmas card tradition began
with this photocard of 1946 (the first Christmas after their marriage).
Sitting in front of the fireplace at their Lake
Street basement apartment which they rented while going to school,
this is a picture for their descendents that will always be worth
more than a thousand words.
1946 Christmas Card
Click
Here to view more Axel and Betty Christmas Cards from 1946 to 1999
Christmas Punch
An expectation for Christmas Eve at
our family home for over 50 years was the Christmas punch made using
a simple combination of lime sherbet and 7-Up. (1)
There was some mystery as to the proportions
and how it was to be stirred. But it was always presented in a grand
style and ladled into cups from the Fostoria punch bowl that was part
of the Fostoria wedding dishes that Axel and Betty received in 1946.
Fostoria punch bowl
and ladle on Axel and Betty's dining table
The Christmas Tree
Mom loved to decorate the Christmas
tree each year and a fresh-cut spruce or fir which always found its
place in the same corner of their living room. She liked as many colored
lights as possible and in the 1950's we had some bubble lights that
seemed special (perhaps because I remember bubble lights on my grandparent's
small tree when I was a little boy).
I also remember my grandparents had
tinsel on their trees and Betty used tinsel alot in the 1950's. She
may have inhereited a few ornaments from her parents but most of her
tree decorations developed over the years one ornament at a time.
I'm sure she knew the history of every ornament on the tree.
"H" Street
December 1951
Lyncrest December 1955
In the 1980's and 90's Mom and I were
both fascinated by some Hallmark motion ornaments that had clear domes
that would display various moving characters and scenes: Kringle's
Toy Shop, The Village Express(with a train traveling around a village
(1), or a sleigh going
around a turn-of-the century house. They were all a bit noisy but
Mom and I thought they added magic to the tree and we had alot of
fun each year at the after Christmas sales when Hallmark would sell
these ornaments for at least 60% off.
Of course as a child the Christmas tree
was most closely associated with the place where Christmas presents
were located. So in the days leading up to Christmas there was the
typical shaking of presents under the tree to try and figure out what
was in each wrapped gift that had your name on it.
My siblings and I were fortunate to
grow up in a time and an environment where we never worried about
not having a Christmas tree or not having presents under the tree
or for that matter not having to worry about anything of real consequence.
Christmas Cookies
We had many 'sweet-tooths' in the family
and we each had our favorite cookie but we also always had plenty
of other cookies to choose from.
Spritz pressed cookies were my favorite
(green tree shaped or red poisettas pressed from our MIRRO Cooky Press).
Sharon's favorites were buttery sugar cookies. Bev and Ron loved spritz
cookies. Bev also liked Mexican Wedding cookies which Mom also enjoyed.
Dad looked forward to haystacks. James liked the frosting covered
sugar cookies the best. But they were all good.
When I was quite young we would make
sugar cookies and use a cookie cutter shaped like Santa that we would
then decorate quite elaborately. What part of that Santa you would
eat first varied in the family.
Sugar cookies were also made with cut-out
stars and christmas trees.
Looking through the mostly hand-written
recipes on the 3 x 5 index cards that Mom used for all of her important
recipes there are a surprising number of memories that arise.
Seeing Mom's handwriting has its own
emotions.
And remembering the smells and tastes
that go with each of those recipes are sensations that still linger.
Ramona Stromberg's Spritz cookie recipe
copied by Betty for her Recipe box. For additional Christmas
Recipes click here
But until I was recently looking at
these recipe cards I had forgotten how many of these recipes came
from friends, so that the sugar cookie recipe that I remember so well
wasn't simply a sugar cookie recipe, it was Violet Edgington's sugar
cookie recipe. The sour cream sugar cookie was Mrs. Taylor's; Ramona
Stromberg's was the spritz cookie recipe and Jean Milford's was the
Mexican Wedding Cookies.
It's also ironic that I remember both
of my grandmother's sugar cookies but I don't have a recipe for either
one. Perhaps that is because I think they baked alot of things without
using recipes.
Even how a recipe got into a recipe
box could have its own path.
Recipes could come from visiting someone's
house and enjoying the cookie and asking for the recipe.
Recipe parties were also an opportunity
to bring your favorite recipe and exchange them while you had a cup
of coffee and caught up on neighborhood news.
My parent's were friends with the Stromberg's
for decades yet the Spritz cookie recipe that was in mom's recipe
box noted that it came via Leota Sondregger, a neighbor and the mother
of a friend of mine, and not from Ramona directly. Giving a plate
of cookies to friends and neighbors was also a common Christmas gift
and a plate received could also result in a follow-up request for
a recipe.
Baking cookies with the associated smells
and then enjoying a warm cookie right out of the oven is a strong
memory for me and clearly comfort food. Although cookies have what
now might be labeled the villain sugar ingredient I think there is
some truth to what Barbara Jordan said about cookies and a better
world:
Think what a better world it would
be if we all, the whole world, had cookies and milk about three
o'clock every afternoon and then lay down on our blankets for
a nap.
I'm certain Santa, the most famous proponent
of cookies and milk, would agree.
When to Open Presents
I was always interested in comparing
the practice friends would follow versus our own tradition for present
opening, namely "When do we get to open our Christmas
presents"?
Our basic house rule on this topic was
that you could choose one gift on Christmas Eve and then the rest
would be opened in the morning after Santa visited.
"In the morning" is a key
phrase and should have been a legally defined term since we were up
before the Sun on most Christmas mornings.
So what do you do in at that time of
morning when not a creature is stirring? I believe that the rule in
our house was that we could look in our stocking and open whatever
Santa had brought as soon as we were up but other presents had to
wait until the whole family was present.
A pre-step before opening any Santa
gift was to first look at the milk and cookies that had been left
for Santa. This was of course at some point more ritual than dependency
about Santa actually having come. Nevertheless it was always good
to observe that at least a bite had been taken out of a cookie and
perhaps a swallow of milk.With that step completed it was then time
to open Santa's presents.
Christmas Music -
Firestone Records
The Firestone store was just across
the street from where Dad worked in Lincoln at the Rudge & Guenzel
Building, 12th & "N".
After we bought our new Magnovox stereophonic
sound console at Montgomery Wards in 1962 Dad would annually purchase
the Firestone Christmas Carol Album at that downtown Firestone store.
These albums were 33 1/3 rpm stereo recordings and they were in competition
with the annual Christmas album offered by Goodyear, their chief rival
in tires.
We were apparently a "Firestone" house,
at least for the Christmas Carol album, and I'm sure our Magnovox
played those albums many times during the Christmas season.
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Bev and Doug listening to Firestone Christmas
Carols, 1962. (Magnavox stereo and selection of 45 rpms
on the shelf)
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Part of the full page
Firestone advertisement in the Lincoln Sunday Journal and Star,
November 24, 1963
(Note: This newspaper got saved because
it was part of the Journal's Sport Red section which was headlined
in red capital letters, NEXT NU STOP... MIAMI
followed by details of the Big Red's victory over Oklahoma 29-20 to
earn a berth in the Orange Bowl).
A family picture in front of the Stereo,
1962. The Christmas tree artwork made by my Aunt Fay on the wall was
decorated with some of her old jewelry.
Christmas Chocolates - Russell Stover
A Holiday wrapped box of Russell Stover
"Assorted Chocolates" was always a treat at Christmas.
From 1942 until the plant closed in
1959 Russell Stover was making hand-dipped chocolates in Lincoln,
Nebraska. I can remember Dad bringing home a box of chocolates and
wondering when it would be opened. I loved the caramels, and the orange
and vanilla creams.
We may have had chocolates before Christmas
but I know after our Christmas Eve supper a chocolate was always offered.
Which one to select was my first question,
but I'm not sure if choosing only one was a rule. I do know that before
I became confident about what was inside the chocolate that I selected
(based on the picture and 'map' provided inside the box), there were
occasions when what I selected was not what I expected and do-overs
were allowed.
Russell Stover chocolates took on additional
family significance after Bev's first summer job which was selling
Russell Stover chocolates at a Gateway Mall store.
Christmas Eve Supper
A light supper before going to church
always included Dad's homemade oyster soup.
Fresh oysters from IGA on 27th Street
or from wherever the freshest oysters could be found that year were
only purchased at Christmas.
Yum Yums (2)
(sloppy joes) or homemade chili were usually options for those who
didn't want to eat oyster soup.
A Russell Stover's chocolate and homemade
Christmas cookies were offered for desert but it wasn't until after
we got back from church that the cookie platter was in full display.
It was also then that the cookies were eaten with our traditional
Christmas lime punch.
Cookie plate 1956
In a Christmas Eve story and tribute
to his parents written for his 2008 Christmas card, Axel gives
us details of what he remembers being served on Christmas Eve when
he was growing up:
"My Mom always prepared oyster
stew, rye bread, cheese, crackers and celery sticks along with pie
for dessert."
Just before bed a plate with usually
two cookies and a glass of milk was set out for Santa's visit. We
were reminded that we didn't put too many cookies out because Santa
had so many houses to visit. Naturally, when we got up in the morning
at least one bite had been taken out of a cookie and a little milk
had been drunk which confirmed his visit and the fact that Santa was
indeed appreciative but probably getting a bit full.
Santa Claus
Mom had a small collection of Santa
Claus figures that she displayed during Christmas and kept in a China
cabinet the rest of the year. She wasn't really a collector but she
did have an assortment of Santas. The most noteable thing about how
she displayed the figures in the cabinet during the year was how they
were organized.
There was one shelf set aside for the
naughty Santas who smoked and had a pipe in their hand or mouth (and
also perhaps had a questionable drink or bottle in their hand).
The grandchildren would always comment
about Grandma putting the bad Santas on their own shelf. I'm sure
there were other anti-smoking discussions with Mom and the kids and
grandkids but I think the naughty Santas on their own shelf were her
best message.
The Naughty Santas
The Address Book
- Tempus Fugit
Sending out Christmas cards for most
of the 20th century had a dependency on the address book. Its information
needed to be accurate and Christmas was a great time to review and
update that book.
Years later, looking through our parent's
address book you were observing a tangible piece of history that documents
how life changes at the most basic level. Hand-written in ink or pencil,
names and addresses have been erased or more often crossed off and
replaced due to a family move, death, divorce, births and marriages.
In the address book you can see how
the first change is relatively easy and crossed-out information can
be strategically replaced close to the original entry. But as each
entry has its own history and as it can change multiple times then
space starts becoming an issue and updated entries start looking a
little messy.
It's also is interesting how long distance
phone numbers started becoming more common entries in the address
book as phone service and technology changed.
I can remember in the 1950's a long
distance call in our house was limited to true emergencies and each
minute on the phone was carefully monitored. I can also remember "collect
calls" coming in and a decision sometimes was required if the
call should be accepted or if we'd say "no" and then call
the number back (which was cheaper than a collect call).
Tempus Fugit is probably a better
name for an address book because in the end an address book, like
our parent's book, is a time capsule of who were the close friends
and relatives of a family and how those relationships were literally
documented and changed in the Address Book over time.
Summary - Tis the
Season
Looking back we had many family Christmastime
activities that took place each year. Some had roots from Axel and
Betty's parents. Some were initiated by Axel and Betty. Some are now
documented, and others were simply part of the moment.
I'm sure my memories are themselves
a recipe made of nostalgia and ingredients of this and that (also
knowing that memories change through the years).
But the smell of sugar cookies and homemade
bread and cinnamon rolls coming out of the wood burning cookstove
that my Grandpa and Grandma Barr had in their kitchen and the flannel
sheets that I would sleep on when we visited them in the winter and
the fresh fir trees that we would decorate and the music of Handel's
Messiah that we would hear at the annual concert in the Coliseum building
on the University of Nebraska campus for me are all still vivid and
sensual memories of the Holiday Season.
I was fortunate to be part of the Axel
and Betty Christmastime traditions.
As the years pass it's interesting what
one remembers and values and wants to document.
As Barbara Kingsolver, author of Animal
Dreams wrote: "It's surprising how much memory is built around
things unnoticed at the time."
For me, these are traditions that I
apparently noticed enough to remember them now.
Bev and Doug at Christmas 1959 listening
to records in front of the radio/phonograph
built by Dad. Bev is holding a 45 rpm. Christmas decorations are
on top of the phonograph - the little white country church that plugged
in and lit up; the wax candles of evergreens and reindeer and the
large turquoise ornament style candle, all of which were never lit
but were displayed for many years.
On the back of this photograph was written
by Mom "Ready for bed listening to records."
Clearly, Friends of the Phonograph
in the making.
